Coming Clean
I have been posting really lite posts lately, in the "lite beer" vein. Not much substance, something you can't really sink your teeth into or enjoy or take away anything like a buzz from. I of course, know I am popular as a very in-depth conversationist so I apologize for not giving you a "fix" even now.
Things I have been avoiding talking about to any great depth:
Things I have been avoiding talking about to any great depth:
- Losing our fabulous elementary principal, 10 years my junior, a personal friend who has turned the school around. I'm really mad at him for taking a job out of the district, leaving us after just 2 years. Of course I realize he owes us less than he owes his personal ambitions. It still feels like he is tossing us aside.
- My daughter and her health/ depression issues. Not sure if it's just hormonal or normal teenage girly issues. This is one place I happen to not have fallen prey too much to so I can't figure out how to help her. I was depressed at this age but I got over it fairly well. I wasn't in any relationships, I didn't have dramatic friendships, I was alone. She has all of those and she feels tired, depressed, out of sorts, angry, sensitive to everything. I work very hard at enforcing a schedule, meals on time (within reason), no extra late nights during the week. Blah! I think it's just being overly stressed but I have a DR's appointment soon for her and J. Her dad was very emotionally challenged during his pubescence as was his sister. They sound like, when I listen to the stories, they might have benefitted from some medicinal help. Both take anti-depressants now. It bears looking into now. But I am reluctant for that for E. And I am not sure I don't enable her to act this way. On the other hand, my mom made it plain she had no time for that nonsense which didn't help me and I don't want to send that message to E.
- School-wide testing coming up. Enough said.
- My job needs and changes. My college transcipts are in my sweaty little palms but I haven't made an appointment to meet an advisor at any university in the city. I hesitate because of the changes inevitable for my kids and me. I don't want to be away from them. I am the only one watching out for them. How can I let that go and move forward? I do love the thought of striking out in the educational arena. I feel stagnant. This is a very multi-dimensional issue.
- Perimenopause...sniff, sniff...crying, wiping tears, laughing hysterically and .....calm....
posted by Unknown at 7:56 PM
8 Comments:
Good grief, you have loads going on... no wonder blogging with any great enthusiasm is hard to do. I completely sympathise. There is one major thing in my life that keeps an undercurrent of misery running through it, so I know that sometimes when you look at that empty blog page its hard to be buoyant and write interesting things. Life is a trial, I think we know that, so getting pleasure where you can is important. I hope your blog, and the comments from your friends, go some way in helping your day seem a little brighter :-)
I actually look at my blogging as an escape and read other blogs as an escape. I don't really want to hash out my problems on here, but obviously I hint. I save the real hashing for my mom or friends. Even then I usually have already hashed it with myself.
I LOVE to get comments since it's communications from friendly people I crave. Usually I am not looking for advice unless I ask but I always appreciate it when it comes. Mom's (AM's) is the very best.
I can definitely relate to the daughter issues. In the past 2 months, my 12 year old has gone from a happy non-stop talking "Daddy's little girl" to a sullen, evasive teen. And I will never understand the twisted relationship between girls and food. Whatever issues teenage boys may have, eating (or not eating) is not one of them. We find ourselves now taking minute to minute readings of her moods and behavior. And I hate homework. I'm wondering how much our stress level would be reduced if homework were removed from the equation. But I'm overstating it, really. She's still great.
Perimenopause...now it feels like I'm right at home.
My wife just went through a week from hell thinking she'd not made her scores, and therefore her incentive pay, for the first time in 15 years.
Of course, she took me on the ride with her.
I should have been a monk. The pay and sex are the same, and it's much quieter.
No, you should have been (could still be) a standup comedian. YOu are a hoot. Too bad it comes from real painful experience.
SOMEONE'S been reading my old posts!
Maybe i should start my own advice column, "Ask Mom." Maybe it could be a second career. Naw, I like being retired to much to start anything else.
1. You care deeply about your school and the kids that are the school. It shows. It is disappointing when someone who has done so much good moves on. Hopefully things will continue to be better.
2. The doctor appointment for E is a good idea. I would hesitate to start any medicine. A good counselor might be more useful, but harder to find. You are doing all the right things there.
3.Going back to college is something you have to figure out yourself. It sounds to me like taking a class would be good for you and therefore good for your kids. Talk to the kids and see if they can support you in this decision. They are likely to think it's a great idea.
4. School testing is a temporary thing. Other problems will replace it. Just take a deep breath and go on through it.
5 Life is just a big roller coaster ride with lots of thrills and scares. Try to enjoy the ride.
You have so many similar issues as me.
1. I worry about our principal leaving before I find my next situation.
2. My son had some issues but a little therapy and meds for a short time helped.
3. I am thinking about going back to school, too.
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